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Scary Kids Toys

Scary Kids Toys


I really had no idea just how Scary kids toyscan be. The following is evidence of some really weird, disgusting, and inappropriate toys to give your children to play with.

Scary Doll
Shave my super hairy body!

The Japanese seem to have a strange fixation on body hair and the desire to shave babies. Parents think it’s important to teach young children the proper way to shave with interactive hands-on training. I can just see the advertisement now…

“Teach your small child to acquire most honorable grooming skill with Shave the Baby! Save money on family haircut too!”

Crazy Laugh Doll
Demonic toys for demonic children.

Anyone remember the Laugh A Lot doll from 1970? The doll expels maniacal laughter which one can only associate with demonic forces. However, what’s worse is that the advertising agency really played up the dark side with its nightmare inducing commercial with fast cuts and creepy ‘I’m gonna kill you in your sleep laughter’. I suggest using this doll as a defensive weapon against would-be robbers as it’s sure to thwart their actions.

Cripple Doll
Handicap Dolls for handicap kids.

I understand diversity and realize that we want our children to be individuals, but a handicap doll is plain creepy. I see it as a sad reminder and not as a tool for children to relate to.

Creepy Bank

Back in the day, every kid had a piggy bank and it was usually made of ceramic and painted pink with a curly tail. Some genius decided that pigs were out and Face Banks were in. Instead of putting the coins into a slot on the top, you put it into its mouth and it chews your coin in a cow like fashion before finally swallowing it down; then it burps in your face. All the while, it glares back at you with vacant dark pupil-less eyes.


Pregnant doll
Very disturbing

Japanese Pregnancy dolls were manufactured in the 18th and 19th centuries mainly for carnivals, but were also used as educational tools to instruct midwives. No matter how you slice it – super gross and creepy.

Pee and Poo doll
I kinda like the pee & poop set.

This is a really crappy toy to give to your kids… literally. Forget the chewing Face Bank and dive right into a swirling pile of dog feces! And if your kid is really into poo, your little one the patented “Pee & Poo” plush toys to help satisfy any curiosities.

russian roulette
What sane parent wouldn't want their kids to play with this?

Last but not least, the crazy Japanese are at it again with a bizarre and terrifying toy, (you may want to brace yourself for this one – it’s a real doozy) drumroll please….                             Russian Roulette!   Just have your child place the gun against their head and hope there isn’t anything in the chamber. If you’re unlucky then hippo legs will jump out and pop you in the head. Just think of the hours of fun your children can have with their friends.


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